10 Days of Thanksgiving

A few years ago I did this thing on my Facebook and Twitter pages where in the 10 days before Thanksgiving, I listed something I was thankful for each day. I decided to do that again this year. I think so often we get so caught up in life and forget that each and every day and everything we encounter is a blessing. 
I decided to switch it up a bit so these ten things may not be the usual ones that you would typically see someone being thankful for. But each of these things makes my life that much bearable.

I'm Thankful... 
10. I'm thankful for "Love". Whether from family, friends, or a significant other. Love is something we all need and give. It is one of the most universally valuable things in the world.

‪ 9. I'm thankful for "Heartache". While it is not something I would purposefully wish on anyone, I can't help but be appreciative for the experience of heartache. It teaches you so many things... Forgiveness, Crying cleanses the soul, and that Ice Cream heals all wounds. Heartache also teaches you to follow your gut. Most of all, heartache teaches you that you are a lot stronger than you think. And that you can overcome anything.

‪ 8. I'm thankful for "Laughter". There is nothing that lifts a heavy heart spirit like a good belly laugh. Even better if it brings tears. No matter what's going on in your life, laughter makes it better. The ability to laugh reminds you that you can overcome.

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 7. I'm thankful for "Books". Listen... I've been a reader for as long as I can remember. Folks talked about me saying if I couldn't be found, it was a guarantee I was lost in a book. And it's true. Books have always been both my escape and a solace. I can honestly say my love of reading has made my life better. I have so much appreciation for my Mom, who always encouraged me to be a reader and my Aunt Juanita who made it her business to keep us supplied in books( I mean she was a librarian).

Make it your business to encourage a love of reading in your kids. I promise it will benefit their lives in so many ways.

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6: I'm thankful for "Beds". Today has been an exhaustively lonnnnnnnnnnnnnngg day. My legs, feet, neck, and back hurt. And when I got off work, the first thing I did was lay across the bed. It's kinda like getting a good hug from someone you really love. Only on some days, like today... better.

Sadly, everyone doesn't have the luxury of being able to lay cross the bed. But I'm really, Really, REALLY Thankful that I can.

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 5: I'm thankful for my "Twitter Fam". I say often if you don't have a good time on Twitter, you're doing it wrong. My luvs keep me laughing, keep me in trouble, keep me in their prayers, and I have no doubt I'm in their hearts as well. So thankful for @NickaS7 @Melodic98 @KeBrittain @SimplyShanWalk @gunhawk18 @Lay1269 @DGraham39 @silowet2006 @NatashaMonique_ @blackhonee @Doestaxxx @CeFranklee @Mon_235 @VirgoNeyez @itsbenzybabii @amanagainstmany @SoloSunni (and Nugget) @daddykn0wsbest @LBrothersMedia @ReidStreetSmart @JamiBeth30 @taball1 @ChunkyChikChasr

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 4: I've tried all evening to come up with something.. My heart is so heavy tonight.. So I think I'll say this.. I'm thankful for "Black Men".. I LOVE Black Men. From Cafe Au Lait to the darkest of chocolates. Their strength, their perseverance, their swag. It simply can't be matched. They are undervalued and under appreciated by so many.. but not me. I appreciate you Black Man. I love you Black Man. I need you Black Man. Stay Strong Black Man. I got your back.

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 3: I'm thankful for "Music". Music is so awesome. It is a part of every aspect of our lives. Whether sad or happy, about love or about pain, Music is everywhere. The right lyrics to a song can have you shouting in praise, two-stepping to the beat or deep down in the delta in your feelings. Music is universal and makes the world go round.

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 2: I'm thankful for "Chocolate". Listen... Whoever sat up and decided to mix up the ingredients to make chocolate needs a award. Chocolate cures what ails you and improves your mood instantly. Chocolate makes the world a better place.
(This post was preceded by the consumption of a very delicious piece of Chocolate Snickers Dream Cake)

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 1: I'm thankful for "Family". Some drive us crazy. Others keep us sane. They are so much apart of the people that we become. Family is supportive. Family is honest. Family is love. Make sure you let yours know that you love and appreciate them.

These are just a few of things that make my life worth living. Some days aren't good. But on those days, just think of one of those things that we all take for granted but that we would really miss if we didn't have. And say, Thank You. 

.................

I cried real tears today. I, like, most people sat in front of my television at 8:00 pm, waiting to hear what I already knew in my heart. Yet, I was still trying to hold on to a glimmer of hope. A small, almost indiscernible glimmer, but there nonetheless. I was watching my Twitter feed and Facebook posts and so many were posting that they too felt the same way. I think, if we're completely honest, everyone in America (and beyond) knew that Darren Wilson would not be indicted for the unnecessary, unprovoked murder of Micheal Brown. 

No, I wasn't there. No, I don't know if Micheal did attack Wilson in his car. No, I don't know if Micheal tried to go for Wilson' gun. I also don't know if Wilson shot Micheal in the back as he was running away, continued to shoot at him as he raised his hands in surrender or stood over him as he lay bleeding in the street.  I wasn't there. 

What I do know is he won't stand trial for it. I do know that the Ferguson officials and police department drew out an unnecessary, agonizing thing for 100 days that could have been decided days after it occurred. All that was wanted, all that has been asked from the beginning, was for Darren Wilson to have to stand trial. That's it. It's no doubt that it would have been a given had the tables been turned and Darren Wilson had been a Black cop killing a unarmed, white teenager. Let's be real. 

Please be clear. All that was asked was that Wilson have a trial. For him to have to be held accountable for what he did. Just like anyone else would have had to had they done what he did. But nope. In this America, it is more than okay to kill unarmed Black men and not have to worry about repercussions. Trayvon Martin. Chavis Carter. Ezell Ford, to name a few. And now Micheal Brown. People keep saying this is a racist thing. And while part of that is true, it's more about a right//wrong thing. 

My nephew, who is 4 years old, has a real tangible fear of the police. If he sees a police officer or those lights flashing, he gets scared and says something about the police "getting him" or at times, "killing us". He's FOUR! There is no reason in the world a child should be scared of those that are supposed to protect him. Except of course, we live in this America. This America where the life of a Black man is worth less than that of a dog. So damn sad.

It's a damn shame that at 4, my baby knows this fear. We try to tell him that he doesn't have to be scared of the police but I honestly think he sees the uncertainty of that statement in our eyes. Because he will say okay. But that doesn't stop the same conversation from repeating the next time we see a police officer. And sadly, in this America, it's an understandable fear. 

National HIV Testing Day

National HIV Testing Day

My Mother's Daughter

My brothers and I have an ongoing joke where we pass our Mother off on one another. We'll say, "That's YOUR Mother". It's mainly when she has done or said something off the wall. Which happens pretty regularly. So she tends to get passed around a lot. LOL.

As I've gotten older, I realize more and more that my Mom and I have a lot more in common than I would have ever believed.  I definitely get more than my good looks and great hair from her. As kid and teenager there was no way in the world I would have ever believed my Mom understood anything about how I was feeling or what I was going through. 

I mean how could she? She was Mom. And it was a different time and things were done differently now, and blah, blah, blah. It's funny how often that is said. And we're always so wrong. True, the drama kids face today may have a different look but it's still the same drama. It's the same things I went through, and my Mom before, and her Mom before her. So I'm grateful that when my Mom said I would be okay and I would get through it, she wasn't just trying to make me feel better. She knew what she was talking about. 

I've learned that in so many ways my Mom and I have lived the same life. We both are readers and revel in our solitude. Both have funny appetites that call for everything at one point and nothing at all, the next. We both were "Guys Girls", meaning we hung with the fellas more so than the girls. We both love our solitude and sleep. We firmly believe in sleeping. 

My build is all my Mom. My slightly bowed legs (no slightly to hers though, she's full on), my milk chocolate soft skin, and my great hair... All her. I get my love of life from her. My ability to forgive and let go as well as my ability to take people at their best and not dwell on the worst because in the end we all have our bad moments . All her. We love deep. And when we love, we love for real. We've both had heartache. We've both felt like outcasts and that no understood us.

And as I've recently learned,  we've both been irreparably hurt by someone that we never would have thought would hurt us. And when we confessed the hurt, no one believed us. 
That is the one thing I wish we didn't share. That is the one thing I wish neither of us had to experience. 

Some things we go through, they are like a mosquito bite. Annoying but pay it no mind and it's not lasting. You feel in that moment and for a little while after but it goes away. Other things are like a cut. It hurts. You feel it deep, It takes longer to go away and even when it does the scar is still there to remind you of it. We have the same scars. 

I think as children, one of our greatest fallacies is that we tend to forget that our parents aren't perfect... That they've made mistakes and bad decisions and gone through some things just like us. But as parents they consider it their duty to shield us from those things. And it's not an act of deception but of protection.

Parents Protect. It's what they do. It's what they were made for. Sometimes we can feel like that protection is too much (and sometimes it is), but they do the best they can. And as children we need to be more appreciative of that. They won't always be right. But their as right as the can be with the experiences that they've had.  I appreciate my Mom and her experiences. 

She's the reason I'm so GREAT! ;-)